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114 posts
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Should there be total honesty in a relationship?
What if, and I say what if, a person has a hidden past that she would like to hide from her partner, knowing full well that revealing it would destroy the most wonderful thing she has with him? Maybe she was young and gullible, maybe she was too wild and too carefree, maybe she was the worst backstabbing bitch in the whole wide world. But she wants to change her life and move on.
Woud you not agree that total honesty is not a good thing?
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Originally posted by ChoCoChips:
if ask, den must confess lo.
arbo like drama like that,
somebody who used to be in her life suddenly appears,
and tell the guy all about the girl.
how?
But that will destroy her relationship with the guy.
So how?
Take a risk. Don't confess seems a better option.
Yeah, maybe the past will catch up one day.
But maybe not.
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Originally posted by charlize:
Ignorance on the part of the other party, yes.But what if the other party specifically asks?
It seems that lying is the only way to bury the past and keep it hidden.
It's not a good feeling, but sometimes, maybe it has to be done.
you have under-estimate the price of jealousy.
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Tell the truth, nothing but the truth... but not the whole truth when she asked~ at least not the part that she will kill you..
I have sex before... not I have sex with your best friend/sister/brother...
I backstab people before in the past...not the part...You being expelled from school was all my doing
I have weird fetish that includes bunny... Not I have love making session with your bunny...
Are you seriously in agony.
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Originally posted by darkensun:
Tell the truth, nothing but the truth... but not the whole truth when she asked~ at least not the part that she will kill you..
I have sex before... not I have sex with your best friend/sister/brother...
I backstab people before in the past...not the part...You being expelled from school was all my doing
I have weird fetish that includes bunny... Not I have love making session with your bunny...
Are you seriously in agony.
So you advocate telling half truths?
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Originally posted by NoobUnited:
Love is simple. It's only human beings that make it complicated.
Well said, Noob. I believe that love should be simple, transparent, and unconditional. Sadly, the society now is far from the above. Everyone seems to be involved in either third party relationships, extra-marital affairs, sexual relationships. Love seems to be a transaction these days. What happened to good old-fashioned love?When asked, I do feel that the person must be completely honest with his/her past. This is to be fair to the other party. Let him/her decide if their past can be accepted.
On the other hand, one should try not to question another's past because we should never judge a person based on their past.
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To be able to exercise FORGIVENESS in a relationship is so much more important than having honesty in a relationship.
Would you have love her less if she wasn't comfortable to be completely honest with you?
Don't forget you were in love with her even when she wasn't completely honest with you.
By expecting her to be completely honest with you for the sake of your love, then it is certain that the feelings you had for her wasn't LOVE in the first place, it is POSSESSIVENESS born from the feelings of LUST.
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Originally posted by parn:
To be able to exercise FORGIVENESS in a relationship is so much more important than having honesty in a relationship.
Would you have love her less if she wasn't comfortable to be completely honest with you?
Don't forget you were in love with her even when she wasn't completely honest with you.
By expecting her to be completely honest with you for the sake of your love, then it is certain that the feelings you had for her wasn't LOVE in the first place, it is POSSESSIVENESS born from the feelings of LUST.
If there was dishonesty in the first place, what is there to forgive? I think that people who are dishonest are the ones who are possessive because they are actually afraid that they will not be forgiven.
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